I Can’t Wait for Baby #2 So I Can Start Sleeping Again

December 24, 2016 0

I Can’t Wait for Baby #2 So I Can Start Sleeping Again As the holidays descend upon us, Kristen and I are also in the final stages of our (okay, her) 2nd pregnancy. I’m obviously happy to be pregnant again, especially after our first pregnancy was preceded by a soul crushing struggle with infertility (NO, SPELLCHECK, I DID NOT MEAN […]

How Not To Shower When Caring For A Toddler

October 18, 2016 1

How Not To Shower When Caring For A Toddler   Imagine the horror . . . you’re in the shower, your wife is at work, and suddenly you begin to hear footsteps on the stairs . . . slowly working their way closer and closer to the top. THERE’S SOMEONE ELSE IN THE HOUSE . . . AND THEY’RE COMING […]

The Snowman Storybook is Corrupting My Child

April 13, 2016 0

The Snowman Storybook is Corrupting My Child [Baby Watch: Day 364] As we pull away from the winter months, I find myself fondly reminiscing about my son and his relatively normal response to seeing snow. He feigned amusement and was generally mildly curious while making the world’s worst snow angel (“Come on kid; just move in ANY direction. Arms up […]

My Baby is a Foodie

April 6, 2016 0

[Baby Watch: Day 357] My Baby is a Foodie My son is half Italian. It is therefore advisable for his future well-being that he learns to love food and eating, otherwise he will be shunned by the entirety of his mother’s side of the family, especially Cousin Hank, who is planning an elaborate vacation to Italy with the lone goal […]

10 Reasons My 10-Month-Old is Better Than Me at Life

February 16, 2016 0

[Baby Watch: Day 307] 10 Reasons My 10-Month-Old is Better Than Me at Life 1. He doesn’t judge me when I smell. I fart, he smiles. I kiss him with my morning dragon breath, he smiles. I crawl around with him on the floor in two-day-old, un-showered squalor . . . he smiles. He still loves me at my absolute […]

15 Lessons I Learned From Curious George

January 13, 2016 0

[Baby Watch: Day 273] 15 Lessons I Learned From Curious George Being a stay-at-home dad who happens to be a former educator, I put a great deal of importance on educational activities. You see, with my not-so-masculine history of musical theater, I’m pretty sure a fair amount of bully-driven anxiety is in my son’s future, which means I want him […]

Post-Apocalyptic Playground Equipment, Ranked

November 27, 2015 0

[Baby Watch: Day 226] Post-Apocalyptic Playground Equipment, Ranked Thinking about a post-apocalyptic America is a depressing proposition for any person, let alone a young and impressionable child. But, being the good parent I am, and never one to sugar coat things, I’ve decided to prepare my child for all potentially disaster-filled and life-altering outcomes for his future world. To do […]

20 Things Every Stay-At Home Dad Doesn’t Want You to Know

November 16, 2015 2

[Baby Watch: Day 215] 20 Things Every Stay-at-Home Dad Doesn’t Want You to Know All I really care about is making sure the mailman can’t hear my kid crying. I’m doing my best here. But I’m still pretty sure that I’m one misstep away from a well-meaning stranger calling Child Protective Services on me. I enjoy his toys as much […]

Verizon Sucks, Even for Babies

November 3, 2015 2

[Baby Watch: Day 202] Verizon Sucks, Even for Babies Recently, the wife and I went to Verizon and purchased two new phones. It was exactly as soul-sucking as we expected, but after multiple hours we left reasonably pleased with our new phones. Within a few days I realized that something was wrong with the speaker on my phone, so I […]

My Son Gives My Heart the Feels

October 23, 2015 0

[Baby Watch: Day 191] After receiving loving criticism from friends and family about the lack of blogs in the past month, I have decided to share 6 stories in (approximately) 6 days to celebrate Baby Oliver’s 6 month birthday. Story #6 My Son Gives My Heart the Feels As the old cliche goes, my mother taught me that “if I […]

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